


What the fuck is going on?

by fruityjewelry52 (dropped_album)



Category: South Park
Genre: Bebe has a semi-important role, Butters is extra innocent, Does ooc stand for out of character?, I'm Bad At Tagging, Inspired by basically every fic where new kid is a girl who talks, Lexi is not to be fucked with, New Kid is a girl, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, South Park: The Fractured But Whole, South Park: The Stick of Truth, Tags Are Hard, When I feel like it, aint no shipping bs, and basically everything lol, and summaries, cartman is extra psychotic, characters might be OOC, cloudy with a 10 percent chance of feels, eventually, except creek cuz theyre canon, fuck all of them are fucking extra as fucking fuck, lexi is lowkey bitchy, new kid talks, or unless i feel like it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:35:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21972958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dropped_album/pseuds/fruityjewelry52
Summary: "What the fuck is going on?"This is what Lexi Miller kept saying to herself as soon as she stepped foot in South Park. And over the course of however long, she realized that she didn't wanna know.(this is my first fanfic and i don't know how to summarize don't sue me)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10





	What the fuck is going on?

**Author's Note:**

> So here I am, a new user, making a fanfic. A South Park fanfic. This is my first fanfic ever so I have no fucking idea what I'm doing. Well anyways, enjoy!

This was it. The start of a new chapter in her life. A new and better life for them.

And she _fucking_ hated it.

OK, let's start from the beginning: Lexi Miller (or Alex, as she likes to be called) is your average 4th grader. She lived in a 2-story house, had great friends, went to your average school, and, in general, lived a normal life. So, imagine her shock and awe when she was told they would move from Denver to this quote "quiet little mountain town" upstate. She was, unpleasantly surprised to say the least. But 3 weeks later, her parents had sold the house, and now they were in their car, heading to this so-called _"quiet little mountain town"_ , and she fucking hated it.

Her friends were endlessly texting her:

Farah: We'll miss you Alex!

Ryan: Damn, the rest of the year is going to be such a bummer.

Avery: Have you made it yet?

Kenzie: What the fuck were your parents thinking?

It was starting to get kind of tiring. She really did not want to talk right now, so she sent them this text.

Lexi: Guys, I'm fine. I haven't made it yet, and I really don't want to talk right now, so give me a break right now, okay?

Her friends understood and backed off. About 20 minutes later, she finally saw what the town was called: South Park.

She finally asked the question that's been in the back of her mind this whole time. "So, why did we move from Denver?" Lexi asked.

"So we could get away from the hustle and bustle of the city, sport." Her dad replied.

She didn't buy that shit for one second. This wasn't someplace with a bunch of tourists and lights like Los Angeles or fucking New York, it was a suburban part of Denver for Christ's sake. But she didn't feel like asking anymore questions, so she just said okay.

An hour later, she was in her new room, hating everything about her life right now, when her parents knocked on her door.

"You in there, Lexi?" It was her mom.

"Yeah I'm here." She replied.

Her parents walked into the room. "So, how do you like your new room?" Her dad asked.

"It's fine." It really wasn't. Lexi really hated everything about it. The stupid walls, how small her closet was, but she didn't want to make her parents upset, so she just accepted it. 

Her mom sympathized with her, saying "Look, honey, I know it's been really hard, but we moved so we could have a better and quieter life. OK, honey?"

She really didn't like it or care for that matter, but she just said ok again. 

"Right. Now go outside and make friends, like normal kids." Her dad stated.

That comment wasn't the thing she wanted to hear, and it sort of pissed her off, but whatever.

"Here's some money if you get hungry." Her mom gave her 50 bucks. She didn't need that much, but whatever. She put on her favorite beanie, some jeans, a T-shirt and a hoodie, and walked out the door to get some McDonald's.

She kept muttering to herself, "Stupid fucking parents, I can't believe they did me like that. Sometimes I wish they'd just listen to me for once."

Not even 2 minutes later she saw two random kids dressed up like they were larping or something. Oh no wait, they _WERE_ fucking larping.

"You shall die by my warhammer, drow elf!"

"Nuh uh!"

Lexi thought it might be fun to just, you know, punch one of these stupid fucking idiots in the neck. Y'know. For fun.

"Ow! Hey, no fair! That's cheating! I'm gonna tell my mom!"

"Go ahead, stupid shit." She didn't care. What was that stupid fucker gonna tell his mom anyway? "Mom, some kid punched me even though that's part of the game!" Ha. Yeah right.

"Whew. Thanks, kid! I didn't know he had a health potion!" 

"Uh, no problem."

"Uh, My name is Butters the Merciful. I'm a paladin. I live right next door to you. We should be friends!" He smiled.

Now she just met this kid, but he seemed nice enough, so she accepted. "Um, sure. I'm Lexi, but my friends call me Alex."

A couple of seconds later, Lexi got a notification on her phone. Apparently, she and Butters were Facebook friends now. She thought that was cool.

"So now that we're friends, you should go see the Wizard King! He's been talking about your arrival! He lives this way, in that green house over there!"

"Um, okay."

"So where are you from?"

"Denver."

"Hey, that's not too far from here! Do you like South Park?"

"I've only lived here for an hour and a half. I don't even have an opinion on it."

“Well, that's fair. Why do you have your hair like that?"

Her hair wasn't that odd. She put a bit of it into two small braids, but other than that, it was normal. "Oh ha ha. How fucking funny."

"Jeez. That's a little harsh, don't you think?"

"You're right. Sorry."

Once the duo got to the green house, she saw this fatass kid come out wearing some type of wizard get up. It honestly didn't look too bad.

"All hail the Grand Wizard!" Butters shouted.

"Ah, Butters. Who the hell is this?"

"This is Lexi! He's the new kid!"

"I'm a girl."

"Oh. **She's** the new kid."

"Ah, yes. So you are the New Kid. Your coming was foretold by Coldwell Banker. I am the Wizard King."

"What the fuck is he talking a-"

She was cut off rather abruptly. "But the time for talk is not nigh. Come, let me show you my kingdom."

"Yeah, he's right. Come on Lexi!" Butters chimed in.

Lexi really didn't know what to think. Especially since this "Wizard King" seemed kind of weird. But who knows? Maybe this could be really fun. She'd just have to give it a chance. What could go wrong?

**Author's Note:**

> Okay. So that was the first chapter of my first fanfiction. This took way too long to write, especially considering that this is kind of short, but it was fun! Hope you guys enjoyed!


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